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The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 11:31
by the masked man
Well, the first two first-round losers will be announced tonight; for them the Cup is over before it's even properly begun. But they should not go gently into the night without some kind of hissy fit. Use this thread to moan about the tone-deaf morons who voted for the pile of crap in the other list. You'll feel much better as a result!

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 11:40
by never/ever
What are the prizes for the best BR?

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 14:04
by C
Eternity in PROG heaven

Yes, eternity in PROG heaven





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Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:07
by Nikki Gradual
never/ever wrote:What are the prizes for the best BR?


Knowing that your rant was better than whatever the winning list is.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:12
by Thesiger
First round losers should have to pre-qualify for next year's cup (unless I go out that way, of course).

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:23
by Apollo's Frock
the masked man wrote:Well, the first two first-round losers will be announced tonight; for them the Cup is over before it's even properly begun. But they should not go gently into the night without some kind of hissy fit. Use this thread to moan about the tone-deaf morons who voted for the pile of crap in the other list. You'll feel much better as a result!


So it's like Big Brother / Max Factor "the act going home tonight is"... am I expected to have a tantrum later?

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:28
by the masked man
Pretty much - it's traditional!

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:34
by Snarfyguy
Apollo's Frock wrote:am I expected to have a tantrum later?

If you don't mind.

(presuming you don't advance to round 2, which, who knows?)

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:40
by Apollo's Frock
Snarfyguy wrote:
Apollo's Frock wrote:am I expected to have a tantrum later?

If you don't mind.

(presuming you don't advance to round 2, which, who knows?)


Ah, so it is only BR if you get knocked out in R1... though I fully expect to be.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:43
by Count Machuki
Apollo's Frock wrote:
Snarfyguy wrote:
Apollo's Frock wrote:am I expected to have a tantrum later?

If you don't mind.

(presuming you don't advance to round 2, which, who knows?)


Ah, so it is only BR if you get knocked out in R1... though I fully expect to be.


I'd say the recriminations from the later rounds are, if anything, even more bitter.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:46
by Apollo's Frock
Count Machuki wrote:I'd say the recriminations from the later rounds are, if anything, even more bitter.


Can't wait! :o

Though I'm not usually bitter.

Off to find a comfort blanket.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:55
by the masked man
Apollo's Frock - previous Bitter Recriminations threads should still be intact. There are some quality rants there, so read and learn! :lol:

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 21:56
by Apollo's Frock
the masked man wrote:Apollo's Frock - previous Bitter Recriminations threads should still be intact. There are some quality rants there, so read and learn! :lol:


Please, where, are they archived somewhere?

A read-up would prove educational.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 22:07
by C
Apollo's Frock wrote:
Please, where, are they archived somewhere?

A read-up would prove educational.


Here lad

Here:

viewtopic.php?f=27&t=108187






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Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 22 Jan 2013, 22:28
by Apollo's Frock
Carlsson wrote:
Apollo's Frock wrote:
Please, where, are they archived somewhere?

A read-up would prove educational.


Here lad

Here:

viewtopic.php?f=27&t=108187

.



Brilliant.

First few posts are just like Millwall fans forum.

I will feel right at home.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 23 Jan 2013, 18:53
by Butch Manly
Apollo's Frock wrote:
Can't wait! :o

Though I'm not usually bitter.


Feelings should not be spared. Personal dignity should be of no concern. No metaphorical teacup should remain unthrown. Extra-points for small-mindedness.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 23 Jan 2013, 19:44
by Qube
Things started off ok before an avalanche of incognisant contributions which can only be described as blind herd mentality, money or sexual favours may even have changed hands, it’s hard to tell.

You voted against Metz, I can only assume because most of you don't have a pulse to set racing, a good list needs to start with a bang, and these guys will take your face off.

La Sera's Sees the Light was my favourite album of 2012, and how could you vote against the goddess that is Katy Goodman? Do your black hearts know no limits?

As Keith Jennings rightly pointed out, the Randy and the Radiants track should be enough to bludgeon any list to death. But no, not even that could penetrate the mountains of earwax built up around the majority of BCB cup voters' ears.

New Zealand's finest, The Mutton Birds should have been an inspired jangle-pop tune to steal your attention, alas, not even their charm could stem the tide of zombies approaching the gates.

I thought I would try and calm things down with a couple of beautiful piano/keyboard ballads, the only other thing I could have done is treat you to a candlelit dinner and a handjob, but I suspect your souls are so empty that your dicks would have offered a paltry dust cloud of an ejaculation, but then I'd have to concede there was enough blood flowing through your decrepit bodies to produce an erection...

You've all proved that there really is no god by voting against Mrs Magician, more harmonious than a Beach Boys circle jerk, shame on you, BCB, shame on you.

Blood Orange is producing the kind of music that Prince can only dream of these days, and I thought I'd dangle a carrot of some familiarity with the exquisite Run-DMC track. Finally, The Web’s “The Same Old Me” brought things to a close, and with it, my hopes and dreams, this list is very me, no compromise.

Not only was I up against a clearly deluded and inadequate cunts with vapid taste, some were too stupid to even vote for the list they meant to vote for. When one particular poster voted for list B because, to quote, "for avoiding Kraftwerk", the user felt the need to proclaim this with a font size of 200, confident in their assertion, with little realisation that list B was the one that DID have Kraftwerk on it.

Comrades, friends, when something like that happens, you can do little but sit back and accept your fate. I think I would rather give others the benefit of such stupidity, by registering an incorrect vote, than simply having such diabolical taste in music.

Of course I could be all wrong, given the humiliating scoreline perhaps I could console myself that my opponent must have come up with the best BCB opening salvo ever seen in the history of the cup. It’s possible, but I can’t help but feeling that Neil Young, Kraftwerk and The Cramps in particular are simply unimaginative cat nip to the masses (as much as I like them all), clouding the judgement of punters.

I give a final wave of gratitude to the chosen few who enjoyed a list that was clearly far too classy for most. I extend my gratitude towards Apollo's Frock, Count Machuki, T. Willy Rye, Keith Jennings, Whodatunkit, Sloop, Owen, Patty O'Furniture, Rank Bajin, pb, zphage, mission, Matty, John Mc, fangedango!, Samoan, Funky Nomad, never/ever, WG Kaspar, The Fish, Mike Boom, kath, Nolamike & Harvey K-Tel, you can play with the cool kids. Some of the other fools really should know better...

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 23 Jan 2013, 19:52
by Walk In My Shadow
Superb rant, Qube.

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 23 Jan 2013, 19:55
by The Modernist
Walk In My Shadow wrote:Superb rant, Qube.


Indeed. Perhaps BCB is cleverer than I thought and there is a cunning ploy to vote off the best writers just so you can get an entertaining rant!

Re: The glorious return of Bitter Recriminations

Posted: 23 Jan 2013, 20:11
by Davey the Fat Boy
Screw the whole idea of bitter recriminations. No way I'm going to post some pithy little rant to mock condemn all of the dullards who voted against my list. Your bad taste is its own curse. I don't need to wish anal fissures on you in colorful language to make you feel good about what you've done here. You don't need anal fissures. You voted for Bjork - the musical equivalent of anal fissures. I wish you all the Bjork in the world. I wish you a life of the crappy music you seem content to wallow in like the deaf little piglets you are. No minstrel show of faux spittle-chinned rage from me...just a very sincere invitation to all of you to ear fuck yourselves with the shitty music you've been ear fucking yourselves with for years. And a full compliment of whatever aural STD's accompany it.